Car Joke - Quattro Vs Uno...

Five Germans in an Audi Quattro arrive at the Italian border. The Italian Customs Officer stops them and tells them "It'sa illegala to putta 5 people in a Quattro."    

 "Vot do you mean it's illegal?" asks the German driver.    "Quattro meansa four" replies the Italian official.    "Quattro is just ze name of zefokken automobile" the German says unbelievingly. "Look at ze dam papers: ze car is designed to karry 5 persons"    "You canta pulla thata one on me!" replies the Italian customs officer. "Quattro meansa four. You have five-a people ina your car and you are thereforea breaking tha law." 

   The German driver replies angrily, "You idiot! Call your zupervisor over. I vant to speak to someone viz more intelligence!"    "Sorry" responds the Italian officer, "He can'ta come. He'sa busy witha 2 guys in a Fiat Uno" 

Drive Safely

A blonde was swerving all over the road and driving very badly, so she got pulled over by a cop. The cop walked up to her window and asked, "Miss, why are you driving so recklessly?"

The blonde said, "I'm sorry sir, but wherever I go, there's always a tree in front of me and I can't seem to get away from it!"

The cop looked at her and said, "Lady, that's your air freshener!"


Courtesy - igoogle

car of the year joke

I continue to be in joking mood...

'The Mercedes-Benz M-Class has won one of the most prestigious readers’ votes in the off-road and SUV world', says press reports in ME. The report goes on to make some claims on GL too... Followed by some official comments, followed by features of the vehicles !!!

I am curious, presuming it is by one of the real prestigious panel/award.

I read on...readers of a magazine Auto Bild Allrad have chosen ! Now, I am more curious ! there seem to be good auto magazines I am not aware of. I am overwhelmed with shame... Thanks to 'Live Search', I am able to check and get enlightened.

This is an 'all wheel magazine' published in Ukraine... We are living in interesting times... Smart way to advertise :) But the iconic brand, tristar/mercedes benz, does it need it ? !

JOKE

I am unable to post anything ... so sharing this internet-forwarded zoke :)

A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money, decided to hire herself out as a 'handywoman' and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood. Shewent to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he hadany odd jobs for her to do.

'Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch,' he said, 'How muchwill you charge me?'
The blonde quickly responded, 'How about $50?'

The man agreed and told her that the paint and everything she would needwas in the garage.
The man's wife, hearing the conversation, said to her husband, 'Does sherealize that our porch goes all the way around the house?

He responded, 'That's a bit cynical, isn't it?'The wife replied,'You're right I guess I'm starting to believe all those 'dumb blonde' jokeswe've been getting by e-mail lately.
A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.'You're finished already?' the husband asked.

'Yes,' the blonde replied, 'and I had paint leftover, so I gave it twocoats.'

Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50 and handed it toher.
'And by the way,' the blonde added, 'it's not a Porch, it's a... Lexus'.